- **ғαŀ¶¦ήģ §№ψ₣ℓªҜ₤š** ;

Friday, December 19, 2008

I feel amused, loved and angry.

Daddy went to this fortune telller. The guy, let's call him John. So John asked my daddy did any child passed away in my famliy. Daddy thought of my grandparents side. Then he asked John why. John said there is this spirit outside my house.

You know guys, I sort of have another sibling older then me. But somehow something was wrong during pregnancy and my parents sort of ended it.

And so daddy wants her to rest in peace. So it will be alot of praying I guess.

And I really feel for her. She never got the chance to experience parental love like I did. Just imagine spending the last 20 or 21 years looking at me grow up and never be part of it. Perhaps souls do have feelings too. I really wanted to see her in my dreams.

So that I can tell her I would love to have a sister.

Yeah that stupid lazy brother of mine...

And they say my family will either have 3 guys or 1 guy n 1 girl and she will be one very pretty girl. And it's either her or me n my younger bro. So says the prophecy.

And when my father told me that, I also don't know how to react.

Late at night when I go home, at times I do feel uneasy outside and just want to get into the house quick. Same goes for my brother. Perhaps it's just a lonely soul wanting attention. She means no harm.

Perhaps if I see her in my dream, I will give her a hug. Perhaps that's the best thing I can give to her?

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Sometimes he just feels happy sending her a nice n sweet message. And he usually does that when he is feeling down. And he feels happy just caring for her. She sends him nice messages too but of course it isn't as nice as wad he sends her. But then again, it is the heart that counts. Some ppl ain't good at words.

And I just wanna tell you that all it takes was changing my thinking abit. It all became special.

And he was loved, not just by his family but her as well. For love works 2 way, you gotta accept it before you can enjoy it.

And It's not how much time we spent together but how we spend it.

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He failed as a person. He does not show empathy to others and just because we have different priorities, he thinks I'm weird. And he doesn't like me for that. When I asked what is wrong with me so I can change, he can't answer. He said dun like means dun like. Nope I'm not going to change my way of life just because of him so he can suck his thumb and shut his foul mouth up.

No don't say I'm being racially biased because I am perfectly fine with the rest of your race.
No don't say I'm being immature because i believe being mature is accepting who you are even though i don't agree with what you do and I am doing that.
No don't say I'm weird because we are just 2 people and no 2 people are the same.
No don't say a word because whatever comes out of your mouth doesn't really go through your brain.

Oh wait, do you even have a brain in the first place?

Perhaps it's just like a coconut husk, filled with water. That pretty much sums out who you are you fucktard.
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17/12/2008
Went out with Kok, Jaslyn n Cladys. As usual they were late. Photo.

18/12/2008

Went to TPY swimming pool to blob around. There was this couple smooching and hugging like nobody's business in the wading pool.

Me:how bout we go walk beside them and then you push me into the pool?

Nice idea.

And we talked about what first kiss stuffs.

I had coffee bean and subway. I am a happy boy.
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If only I were her. I will end up in NY and most prob I will be together with Kok Wey and we will be a happy couple. And that Igoric Kok would have lost his first kiss LONG LONG time ago.